It Lies Within You.

story of my life.

I’ve never really had these problems before. 

I mean ya, duh, I have issues. But not... Boy trouble. #ughfuck.

I’ve been in pickles.

I’ve had to tell boys that love me that I just don’t feel the same way, I've had boys like me that I absolutely hate, I've loved boys that don't know I exist...

But I’ve never had boys to actually choose from before. You can call me coincided, and maybe I’ll lose all my ‘options’ if they read this... 

But I am not cocky, I am just stating the obvious.

In high school I wasn’t the happiest of people.

I didn’t exactly enjoy my all-girls-catholic education and more importantly I didn’t put myself out there. I definitly did not take advantage of my high school, but it's high school... 
At-least I made it out in one piece... We can be grateful for that, right Mom? Right. 


I wasn’t one of the pretty girls, with all the boys. 
Because I’m prettyyy sure I didn’t really start trying and putting myself out there until after high school. 

I do appreciate the education I recieved and the non-presence of boys, at the time. I can’t imagen how differently I would have turned out had I had to face even more immature boys, than the 20 somethings I’m dealing with now. 

I’ve always been one of the pretty girls but I didn’t utilize it until now. 
This was then...

*Note the uniform.

 This is now.

AGAIN IM NOT COCKY IM JUST STATIN THE OBVIOUS 

I’ve always been a dreamer and a wander. I still am, only now I feel like I’m pretty [and] in touch with reality. 

Im sorry if I, and this blog, annoy you. But there’s how many other things out there you could be reading on the internet?

One thing I’ve learned is that happiness is contagious. 

And maybe it’s blinding too. Shit, in my life, will eventually hit the fan again. 

But if I’m as happy with myself as I’m now and it does, I think I’ll be ok. 

I’m going home for the summer. Atleast part of it. 

I need a little break from the #btv, right now. So I guess I can wait until June. 

But honestly, when I think of not being here for the summer I get sooo upset. 

Last summer was amazing. 

BUI waiting to happen

I never ever ever thought I would be ok again with living at home BUT I will be.

I’m 21 now, I can drink with my fam and I can hang with my fam without killing them. 

After all my years of rebellion it will be nice to be able to live civilly in my own home, with my dogs. 

I will miss Burlington Summer Crew buttt it’s not like I won’t be here. I mean come on, you can take the girl out of Burly but you can’t take the beer out of her hand. 

I’ll be up to visit as often as I can! but I need to gain some more responsibility and more importantly... I neeed to save money. 

If I ever plan on living on my own permanently.

Now, lord knows my plans are never final. But I think this is the plan for now. We’ll see.  

"It doesn't matter what lies behind you, or ahead of you, it matter what lies within you." @almightypickle